Should all parents be required to attend a parenting course before they can claim child benefit?

We’ve all heard the expression, “You need a licence to have a dog but any fool can have a baby.”

Now, admittedly I am one of those fools and I have had 4 babies so I’m glad they haven’t brought in that law because if they did my kids would be off to the pound probably with half the kids in the country. 

The funny thing is, no one really knows how good or bad a parent is going to be until they experience the unconditional love and sense of duty to nurture, protect and provide for their helpless innocent miracle. With one fleeting glance, of bewilderment, confusion and fear, which accompanies their first breath as they arrive in this crazy world, our babies place all their trust in Mum and Dad. If they could speak they would probably say I’m scared, I chose you to me my mum and Dad so will you mind me? So deciding who should be awarded a licence to raise a child is of course a ridiculous notion and I have seen some of the most unlikely people become some of the most amazing parents in every way.

But the problem is that when an infant looks at you for the first time with those trusting eyes, the fear hits you like a bad dose of the flu. You feel sick, nauseous and scared as you realise you now have a huge responsibility towards this new precious gift and it occurs to you that you know absolutely nothing about being a parent. Many of us spend our lives doing training courses or go to college so we can become better equipped to get a job and make our mark on the world but as I reflect on my preparations and training to make it in the big bad world it strikes me that I never once attend a single training course to prepare me for the most important job I would ever have, the job of being a good parent.

Is this not totally irresponsible on my part to not get some professional advice from an experienced parent to remind me and advice me on my duties towards my children. How am I supposed to know what to do in the infinite number of instances where I have to act in a logical, calm and considered manor to ensure not only the safety but also the emotional development,  confidence and happiness of mf my child.  How do I influence them to have good character a strong moral compass and develop and build on their natural talents and not push them down a life path they are not genetically, physically and mentally wired to cope with. On my part I am lucky that my kids have an extraordinary mum who happens to be very in tune with their development needs and has an extraordinary intuition in understanding what the need and how to communicate with them. Luckily for me this leaves me in a position to be a fun dad while she keeps me and the kids in check. But of course no one is perfect and still, as parents doing our best, get it wrong lots of the time.

But what about the mums and dads who have the ability and desire to be the best parents in the world but simply have not acquired the skills or training to be a confident parent? What about the Mum’s and Dad’s who establish their parenting approach based on their own experience as a kid when it was common for kids to be seen and not heard, given a good hiding for being bold, never listened to and to be put in a corner for being lazy and stupid when in fact they had a learning difficulty.

So why am I writing about all this? Well as you know I want the world to be a better place and want every child to have a wonderful loving childhood that nurtures confidence and filled with adventure and happiness and laughter. With this in mind I am going to suggest something and would like your opinion on it. In Ireland we have a government payment to parents called children’s allowance. It is available to every child under the age of 18 and works out at about €120 per month. My idea is that before you can avail of this payment every parent must attend a mandatory recognised parenting course when their child is born again at age 5, 8 and 13 years of age. The cost of funding such a course would come out of the first month’s children’s allowance payment so parents will never notice it gone as the payment starts one month later. The benefits are of course huge and God knows I could do with a few parenting courses myself. Jobs would be created as the courses would have to be delivered. All very simple and everyone is a winner especially the kids. So before I go off writing to the minister for children hopefully you can leave some comments on Facebook and this blog that will give me a bit of confidence and encouragement to try and make it happen.  

I’ll keep you posted of any developments.

Hugs to everyone!

Benji

They can do it....So Let them!

Look at the mess you made

“Quick Quick!" "Hurry Hurry!" "Come on we're late!" Give it to me I’ll do it. No! you'll hurt yourself. Be careful I’ve just cleaned up. I’ll do it you will only spill it. No! you’ll make a mess.  Don’t do that. Stop shouting. Stop running around you’ll break something. Be quiet your making too much noise. Look at the mess you’ve made. Now look what you made me do!   

Be Careful

 Sounds Familiar? Of course it does, we are parents, it’s what we do best and god knows I’m probably world champion at barking at the kids.

Don't Fall

Looking at these sentences written down on a page I'm shocked to realize that they are not the words of a loving parent but rather like the negative ranting of a controlling, bossy school yard bully who blames everyone else for what is going wrong. And the scary thing is this is what the kids hear which is not good for their confidence of self-esteem or my relationship with them.

Who is going to clean your Clothes

The problem is, that as parents we are so busy buzzing round trying to keep the cosmos in its fragile state of equilibrium while doing our best to raise a bunch of nutty kids. So in a futile effort to make time to visit the loo it is often easier and quicker for us to do “EVERYTHING” for our kids to try and keep one step ahead. As quick as we can we set the table, make their breakfast, make their lunch, get their clothes, probably help them dress, tidy their room, pick up their clothes, clean up after them, put away their toys, wash the dishes, sweep the floor the list goes on and on. God knows I do my fair share and while we are all doing this the kids are probably sitting  on their cute little bottoms scrapping over who’s go it is on the Wii or what TV show they want to watch.

This Dinner is going to be yum

Great Work Robbie that's very good

So here are my thoughts on the subject. Firstly kids are kids and need to do what kids do. They need to play, explore, get excited, shout and scream and run around, climb things fall off them, bang their knee and climb back up again, they need to bake things, make things and break things. All these activities and behaviors gel together into what we all like to call “Learning”. So as parents we need to nurture and embrace this behavior but also channel all this energy into constructive learning. I don’t think we give kids enough credit for their intelligence, ability and desire to do things for themselves so from a very early age it is important to encourage kids to have lots of fun and play but also to do thing for themselves.

Nice Work Guys

Great job Setting the Table Molly

So as well as doing all the fun stuff there is no reason why the kids can’t do the boring stuff as well. So next time when your slaving away in the house encourage the kids to come and help. Have a chat with them while they are helping, tell them how great they are, make some chores their entire responsibility each day and most of all make it fun. For Example we encourage Molly to set the table and when she really gets into it she sets a place for Adam and places a picture of Adam, a candle and a little angel on the table which is really lovely and we all have a lovely dinner time. This fun way of delegating  household chores not only enhances your own relationship with your kids as you both communicate while working but it also helps build independence confidence and self esteem a strong work ethic and ability to figure things out for themselves and after all it is better than leaving them in another room watching TV.

The garden will look great when the grass grows

Of course it’s not always plain sailing all the time, there will always be resistance, crankiness and tiredness so there are no hard and fast rules. So don’t end up having a row just try and encourage them to help so they do it willingly and pick your moments and your battles and don’t try this technique when you’re rushing out the door already 10 minutes late for school.

Good luck, be brave and have a great week.

I would love to hear your comments or suggestions so if you have any please add them by clicking the comments button.

To get signed dedicated copies of Adam's Adventure book visit www.adamscloud.com

Every Child Deserves To...

Before I start my blog I just want to say sorry it has been a while since my last blog as over the past 2 weeks I was away in London promoting and at present Jackie is away leaving me home alone with 3 nutty kids and no instructions, but at least were having fun. So on to this week’s Blog with a nice video below.  

 

On my recent travel to London a bone of contention has raised its head that I feel the need to address. When I'm promoting at big events lots of different people of all walks of life pass me by and over the years have come to realise that everyone has their story, their pain and their worries. I often engage in wonderful conversations with so many of them that always have such a lasting impact on me long after they are gone and that keep me grateful for the things I have. 

During these events lots of young mums and dads, with their babies, pass by and I invite them to have a look at the books and as I dote on their very cute babies they thankfully complement my books with many of them buying and others politely moving on. Of course there are some parents who don’t come over as they are rushing to change a nappy or get the next feed in. I've been in that situation enough times with my own kids so know when not, to go waving books in their face.

So what's the problem? Well, so far there is no problem, but then comes the parents that quite simple make my blood boil make, me bite my lip until it is practically bleedingand make me want to shake some sense into them. My problem is with the parents I invite to have a look at the books who then tell me that their kids are either too young, can’t read or practically take a trip around the moon avoid coming near my stand in case they might have to buy a book that doesn’t read itself, paint their nails and babysit their kids. This video is proof that they are never too young for a book.

Now, I know I am overly passionate and emotional about my books and the message they contain as they are so deeply inspired by Adam, but being honest, it kills me to think that some parents have no idea of the importance, on so many different levels, of reading to their children. Is it fair to assume that, if they can’t be bothered to read them a bedtime story, they also couldn’t be bothered to bring them for a walk in a park, play with them, colour with them, talk to them, guide and encourage them, instil confidence in them, just do their best for them or just tell them they love them?

So, No Matter What…

Every child deserves to be hugged and cuddled. Every child deserves to have their imagination ignited with words and adventures. Every child deserves to have 10 minutes dedicated to them by their parents at the end of the day. Every child deserves to have confidence instilled in them through reading, conversation and praise. Every child deserves not be shoved in front of the television all day long. Every child deserves to have fun, play and make noise without fear. Every child deserves to be allowed to be a child. Every child deserves to learn. Every child deserves to be loved. Every child deserves to be happy and every child deserves to have parents that care and do their best for them.

 

This is the essence of Adam’s Message and this is what I am trying to promote

Thank for your visit this week and helping me spread Adam’s Message.

Lots of love hugs and kisses

Benji

The Power of Love:Creates a Magical Moment for Noah and his Mum

After a massive and amazing response last week to Geraldine's message about her little boy Noah who was left deaf after an infant illness, this new message from baby Noah's mum has again left me speechless. I wonder did Adam have anything to do with the latest developments of the date change of his operation. I suppose at this stage I should not be surprised with some of the strange and wonderful things that happen as a result of Adam, his books and his amazing friends on his Facebook page. I hope all goes well for Noah on the 20th of March

Dear Benji,
I have been amazed at the response our story has received and completely overwhelmed by the messages of love & support. Yesterday I really felt on such a high reading through these messages and then I received a very important & unexpected phonecall. Beaumont hospital rang to tell me Noah's implant operation date has been brought forward by 8 weeks to March 20th. That really is what an amazing day feels like. Thank you so much to everyone for your support & again to a fantastic author for giving us all these brilliant books to share with our children.

  Here is the original message from Noah's Mum

Last week I received this extraordinary message from a very special mum that not only touched me deeply but also demonstrates the power of love and the importance of expressing your love for your children every day as we never know what challenges lie in wait to test us. 

 

Hi Benji,

I just thought it would be nice for me to share this with you. In July 2012 I gave birth to identical twin boys but while we were still in hospital one of my boys became critically unwell. He had necrotising entrocolitis which resulted in his bowel rupturing when he was 6 days old. He had sepsis & septic shock and was well & truly fighting for his life. He suffered problems with his heart which made his heart beat extremely fast at times so his heart rate was always a huge concern. When he was in intensive care I wanted him to hear my voice as much as possible and so I brought in your wonderful books which belonged to my older children. I loved reading the I love you book, "Before you Sleep," to him, I'd read it over & over and one evening the intensive care nurse said to me that it was amazing, his heart rate had come right down as I read to him. Because of this I know he was hearing me. As a result of his illness he lost his hearing and is now awaiting cochlear implant. What I really wanted you to know is that those stories are amongst the last words Noah heard & I can't imagine any nicer story so full of love to have told him, so thank you so much for writing it. We are all looking forward to the next book :-)

Happiness! It's right in front of us

The Power Of Love

Last week I received this extraordinary message from a very special mum that not only touched me deeply but also demonstrates the power of love and the importance of expressing your love for your children every day as we never know what challenges lie in wait to test us.

 

 

 

Hi Benji,

I just thought it would be nice for me to share this with you. In July 2012 I gave birth to identical twin boys but while we were still in hospital one of my boys became critically unwell. He had necrotising entrocolitis which resulted in his bowel rupturing when he was 6 days old. He had sepsis & septic shock and was well & truly fighting for his life. He suffered problems with his heart which made his heart beat extremely fast at times so his heart rate was always a huge concern. When he was in intensive care I wanted him to hear my voice as much as possible and so I brought in your wonderful books which belonged to my older children. I loved reading the I love you book, "Before you Sleep," to him, I'd read it over & over and one evening the intensive care nurse said to me that it was amazing, his heart rate had come right down as I read to him. Because of this I know he was hearing me. As a result of his illness he lost his hearing and is now awaiting cochlear implant. What I really wanted you to know is that those stories are amongst the last words Noah heard & I can't imagine any nicer story so full of love to have told him, so thank you so much for writing it. We are all looking forward to the next book :-)

We have a great opportunity for an Intern...

 

www.Adamscloud.com

Require

Online PR and Marketing Intern

 

The Opportunity

Under the government backed www.Jobbridge.ie internship scheme. This is a great opportunity to work in a very successful publishing business that has 7 number 1 best selling and award winning children’s books. Currently expanding into the UK with Distribution of all titles through WHSmiths the UK’s biggest book retailer and other major distributors this is an opportunity like no other. To develop an already successful online marketing strategy this position will initially be a 6-9 month work experience internship with the potential for a full time position. Candidates will be given full autonomy responsibility and exposure on the frontline of marketing and PR in the Publishing industry and will also benefit from one to one mentoring with Author and businessman Benji Bennett BA B.Sc MBS.

 

Core skills to include some of the following...

The candidate must be positively charged thinker who is highly motivated and passionate and have a desire to prove that nothing is impossible once you are focused and positive.

The candidate must be an energetic and happy individual of strong character and integrity who is respectful to others.

The candidate must be a good communicator, be able to work on their own initiative and get things done.

Must have completed or currently studying 3^rd level qualification in PR, Marketing or other Relevant Qualification preferably with internet Marketing focus.

Must be highly proficient and experienced user of Online Social networking sites including Face book, YouTube, Twitter and other information sharing internet sites such as Boards.ie etc

Familiar with how to Edit and share Video and images content on the net

 

Key Role

Work closely with the business owner to develop and implement online PR and marketing strategy focusing on Ireland, UK and USA other markets

Responsibilities to include

Optimise social networking sites and develop contact strategy globally.

Manage online operations including competitions and online contact strategy.

Develop and implement Online Advertising strategy and identify and target optimum websites to engage with for promotion and advertising Globally

Grow existing contact Database  by extracting email addresses of customer that engage with the business

Conduct analysis of website traffic and correlate with sales to develop further insights.

Develop online competitions to derive sales and customer contact details

Develop viral email campaigns to market author events, updates and books signings

Assist in the management of Blog content and distribution.

 

 

A Poem for Valentine's Day

 

 

 

Valentines, that special day, can cause a lot of stress

Will she like my present and will he like my dress?

How does someone show their love for the person they adore

Is it gifts and dinners and perfume by Dior?
 

 Well that’s all fine and easily done and most of the time is lots of fun

But head my warning everyone this romantic gesture is easily undone.

It's a poem to read with brekkie in bed, a gentle heart to rest your head

Coming home early to give your love an hour alone to rest in bed
 

 

To play with the kids like never before giving your love a break to adore

Not playing with your phone checking the score or complaining that your finger is sore

It’s making your valentine feel noticed each day and not for one night when you’re out on display

So dinner a perfume alone won't work to show your love on Valentine's Day

No one is perfect so when the effort is made weather you like it or not don't be dismayed
 

Just enjoy the moment for what it is and relish in the attention that you are being paid.

Happy Valentines day

lots of Love hugs and kisses to all my wonderful friends on Facebook

Benji

Benji's Interview After Winning Book of the Year 2013

I hope you enjoy this interview that was conducted straight after I won the Board Gais Energy Irish Book Awards for the second time last November 2013. It took a little while to get my hands on it so only getting it up online now. No rest for the wicked I have to start writing another book and go for number 3 in 2014. Enjoy!

Lots of Love Benji.

My Story, My Journey in My Words

My Story In My Own Words

Published Irish independent Nov 2014

Benji Bennett

As I ponder on the publication of a 7^th book, the 5^th to be nominated for the Irish Book Awards I find myself in a fortunate position to have been blessed with life’s most precious gift, family love. Being blessed with 4 wonderful children Adam, Harry, Robbie and Molly I am also incredibly lucky to be married to Jackie, a most extraordinary woman who has helped me to realize that, love laughter and fun in the family, is the most powerful, dependable, and enduring force that protects the Human spirit from obliteration when faced with adversity, fear, pain and loss.

However, acquiring this feeling of gratitude and contentment has been hard fought and seemed an impossible dream 6 years ago. It was then that our world imploded on itself when Adam, our 4 year old beautiful golden-haired, brown eyed, giddy giggler was lost to us within hours of taking ill with an undiagnosed brain tumor.  As dawn approached on, a balmy August morning, tranquility and peace transcended the intensive care unit where Adam lay still for so many hours and Jackie and I lay beside Adam cherishing what we knew to be out final moments with him. Just as Adam had arrived into the world with a ray of morning sunshine kissing his newborn head so too had he left us at dawn in loving silence surrounded by adoring parents, aunts, uncles and grandparents. In a puff he was gone to his cloud.

Shock, disbelief and denial were followed by desperate attempts to wake myself up from a relentless and enduring nightmare from which there was no escape. Squirming, clutching my stomach in a feeble attempt to ease my gut wrenching pain I begged for relief as I sat broken, in all regard, on the couch in my sisters house. Life was over, there was no air, the simple act of drawing a breath became, panicked, claustrophobic and at times seemed pointless.

Then out of nowhere came a moment, a simple moment of hope, where I took a breath and realized it happened all by itself. This simple act of being able to take a breath without consideration or being accompanied by an entire respiratory system spasm you would usually associate with a child recovering from the trauma of losing their favorite toy was a welcome relief from an incessant battering of my mind, body, spirit and soul. As each day, week and month went by these moments became more frequent and endured for longer. Like a tide covering the sand on the shore, so to, did these unexplained moments of relief cover my pain even if only for a brief moment.

As time progressed this new tide of tranquility, to which I had become so dependent, seemed to come and go without fuss like small waves lapping gently upon the shore on a humid summer’s morning. This would become a new friend who would gently come to ease my pain and peacefully tend to my deep wounds that were showing signs of beginning to heal.

With Jackie’s strength, love and outlook on life and the responsibility to save the magic of Harrys childhood and his incredible strength I Know something had to be done to save what we had rebuild our lives in an attempt to create a life without Adam.

It is only now as I reflect on my journey that that I realize that there was a commanding driving force powering this emotional tide that gave me moments of peace. The epicenter of this force was of course Adam’s Message of love laughter and play in the family. But without the love, strength and support of my most courageous wife, Jackie, the prospect of a new life with a baby on the way and my responsibility, as a dad, to Harry, the bravest one who had lost his best friend I would never have had the will to get up in the morning, let alone embark on a crusade to immortalize Adam and deliver his message.

As my confidence began to grow so too did my passion and armed with a simple message to encourage parents to have more fun with their kids, create magical moments and constantly tell them they are loved my first book was conceived. Safely backed up on crumpled pieces of paper that were constantly stuffed in my pocket I shared my various drafts and updates with anyone who cared to listen. As I showed my scraps of paper concerned looking family and friends the reaction naturally enough was very positive. In fairness who was going to tell me that my book was a pile of dribble when they were confronted by a person who had a sorry excuse for a scruffy beard, wore his jumper inside out and back to front and looked like they were going to burst into tears if you simply asked them if they wanted a cup of tea. Yes a very positive reaction indeed.

Then came the idea of publishing the book myself and that’s when my family began to worry about my sanity. Mad as it would seem there was no plan expectations or rational to my project.

Guided by his simple message and philosophy every decision and action taken was driven by a burning ambition to write and publish a book in memory of Adam that would be filled with everything beautiful, innocent and fun about him in the hope that parents would share in his magic. The prospect of a parent snuggled up under the duvet and expressing their affection for their children would prove to be a wonderful legacy for Adam and something to get me concentrate on.

As Jackie discovered we were to have a another baby on the day we collected Adams Ashes we knew there’re was a very clear sign that he would take care of us and would guide us to do the right thing. T 

After a frustrating and fruitless search for an illustrator I happened to catch a glimpse of a colorful book in a shop window and written on the front were the words Illustrated by Cartoon Saloon. With a weakness of remembering things at the best of times I thought it an easy name to remember and got in touch with them that same afternoon. After preparing a very long brief a then unsuspecting Roxanne was appointed illustrator without knowing anything about Adam. As the brief hit her desk se immediately felt the magic and wonder of Adam and his message and became emotionally engaged with Adam and his message.

As the draft illustrations began to arrive in my emotions, as well as Jackie’s, began to get out of control. To see new images of Adam coming to life through the illustrations and having so much fun brought on powerful waves of emotions that were uncontrollable. In a strange way the tears were not as painful as the ones I had become accustomed but were instead wonderfully soothing, calming and sprinkled with sense of happiness. As the illustrations came in our need to get updates more frequently intensified and reached an addictive frenzy until Roxanne had completed them all.

Now all the production work done the next decision was how many books to print. This is the point where ignorance is bliss I hadn’t a clue so to keep my unit costs down I printed 10,000 copies. Considering only 350 copies sold in one week can potentially see your book hit number the quantity I printed just seemed to be, and I’ll put it mildly absolutely off the scale insane. I had no PR no Publisher and no one knew who I was. The commercial business case was even worse than Anglo’s. It seemed inevitable that every member of my family would have to buy 500 copies each and stuff them in the toilet under the stairs. In an odd way I never had any doubts that the book would sell as Adam was on side and after 3 key interviews on Ireland AM, Ryan Tubridy and the Irish independent word got out and people began to buy Before you Sleep and enjoyed the experience of reading it to their kids who loved being told they were loved in a book. Within 6 weeks I was back to the printer for the second print run and sales have kept growing ever since.

 

The following April 9 months after it first appeared Before you Sleep won book of the year at the Irish book awards in the company of mu family to astonishment and amazement. As my name was called my immediate thought was towards Adam and the excitement of winning was somewhat dampened as I was quickly ushered up to accept my award and make a speech. But all I wanted to do was crawl under the table and scream Adams name and tell him I did it all for him. Even though I received a standing ovation from a room of highly acclaimed writers and professionals I still feel a little bit cheated that I could not have had a longer moment under that table with Adam After all here picked me to be his dad on the day he was born to deliver his message.

Adam you’re a good boy and we all love you very much and thank you for the gift of your message and your stories.

This year marks Benji’s 5^th nomination for the Irish book awards for his new book When you were Born which is also available in selected Dunnes Stores as well as bookshops nationwide. PS We Wo

n!

Whoa! We Won Another Book of the Year Award.

Holy Zingbats. We won another Book of the Year Award for "When You Were Born". That makes it 5 nominations and 2 Wins so far, I still cant really believe it.

A very special night indeed and a big pat on the back for keeping my dinner where it was supposed to be as the nerves were so bad I felt sick and really was an emotional wreck 

Don't let the smiles fool you, we were as nervous as hell. With loads of celebs and photographers flashing electric atmosphere into the room or some reason they took one us Jackie and I

Just love the award. I had my eye on it for some time and still can't get used to having one of my very own

With 5 nominations and 3 wins plus winner of  book of the decade I think I can consider the awesome Derek Landy of Skullduggery fame  my Buddy...

 RTE Jr. TV Presenter Emma O'Driscoll Presented the award on the night 

WOW! Thanks for all the great suggestions for Adam's next Adventure. There were so many. A lot involving time travel back in time, an African safari adventure, an under the sea Adventure, the land of fairytales adventure, spooky adventures, How Adam got his cloud, adventures in the attic, Easter egg hunt adventure, a trip to the Olympics, down under in Oz, and loads more.... There is so much to do but don't worry I think I have something planned you are all going to love. Ill keep you posted.....  Benji www.adamscloud.com

Answering the "Big Question" at Bed Time

 

Here's the answer to a question you might want to share with someone you know...      
Last night while lying in his bed, Robbie, who usually goes asleep no bother after reading his books, gets thinking about the future and about Mum and dad getting older. He then reaches the worrying conclusion that when he grows older mum and dad won’t be around forever. With a little whimper he calls out from his room, “DaaaAAaad”, and up I go to see what is bothering him. Quietly and sadly he says that he can’t sleep as he is worried that when he grows up I might die and he is sad and worried. “Robbie,” I said, “you don’t have to be sad or worried because the way the world works is that when you are small I need to be with you all the time so we can have loads of fun and for me to teach you things, help you learn to play football, bring you to school, take you on holidays and give you lots of hugs and kisses. But when boys and girls grow up their Mum’s and Dad’s work is done on earth so we have to go to heaven to mind you when you are older and make sure you are always happy when you have your own children. So the reason people die and go to heaven is to make sure everyone still here can be minded and are always happy.” “Oh!” says Robbie, “I didn’t know that. So when you die I just can’t see you but you will still be there to make sure I’m happy”? “Yes Robbie, that’s it, now you go asleep and I’ll take you to school in the morning.” “Thanks Dad.” Night Night!” Just as Robbie was about reach out for a good night kiss and hug one last thought popped into his head. “Dad, do you know what else happens when you die.” “What’s that Robbie?” I replied, “When you die you will be happy as well because you will see Adam and Adam will be happy because he will see you, so everyone will be happy not just me.” “Robbie, you’re such a good boy, yes when people go to heaven everyone is happy”….. Phew! I think I handled that one OK. Benji www.adamscloud.com